Ninja Turtles and Other Mutants: An Illustrated History

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Egyptian Gods. Fairy tale creatures. Mickey Mouse. Animals have always been used to tell stories, but in these cases - and many, many others - they don't just talk, as in, say, The Jungle Book or Finding Nemo. They also stand upright, wear clothing, and generally behave like humans. They are anthropomorphic (anthro, "human being" + morphe, "form").

In these past two weeks, two blockbusters featuring humanoid animals were released: Marvel's Guardians of the Galaxy with Rocket Raccoon, and the rebooted Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Critics loved the first and hated the second. Neither quite lived up to my expectations. Admittedly, the hype itself was more entertaining in both cases, allowing me to revisit my longstanding love of "mutant" characters and how they have fueled my own imagination. So I give you my TMNT review by way of this lengthy illustrated history!

Roundup: PSN Downloadable Games

Happy Easter and Passover! Aside from heartwarming, faith-building religious celebrations (and pretty unrelated but associated secular traditions), my kids and I took advantage of some PlayStation Network sales going on this weekend. A simple tweet would have sufficed for passing these along, but I decided to share my impression of one in particular:

Jurassic Park: The Game - Full Season
Released 11.15.2011
Teen
1 player
$0.99 (This weekend only!)


One of the things I've come to love about downloadable games is how much more affordable they are than disks. We've been known to pay the dreaded new release price on games like Lego Marvel Super Heroes, usually as gifts, even though the price always drops over time. We make sure we'll like these games before buying, but that doesn't mean I wouldn't prefer to pay less (legally, of course). With Jurassic Park: The Game, we got all four chapters of Telltale's episodic story for only a dollar, which means I'd be happy even if it was only okay. That's what I was expecting based on reviews, but after completing Chapter 1 today, I'm even happier with this deal. It's more than okay.

I'm a huge Jurassic Park fan (I've read the book more than any other, and consider the movie a classic), so maybe I'm easy to please. Then again, knowing the material as well as I do, it was also possible I'd be extra critical. The game is based on the first film, taking place during and after its events, so I do wonder why Chapter 1 hints at a larger, free-roaming group of velociraptors when the movie Park only had three that didn't escape until the last act. Maybe Telltale pulled some material from the book, which ends with the discovery that the raptors had built an underground nest and were breeding all along (a concept explored in the movie relative to other species). In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if the writers did pull from the book, given the subtle scientific details woven into the game's story and extras. I don't recall Harding having a daughter in the book, so they're clearing picking and choosing; still, that strikes me as both appropriate and agreeable, and in many ways results in a story that feels more Jurassic Park than the sequel films. Michael Crichton, the book's author, was reluctant to write the sequel (The Lost World), but I wonder if he ever considered a story that runs concurrent to the original, as these writers did.

The main complaint I noticed in reviews is that there's more story than game. You know those cinematic moments in other games where you lose full control of your character and have to press the right sequence of buttons to survive something dramatic? That accounts for most of the gameplay here. There's no free roaming, no traditional fighting, no leveling up, etc. It's like a "choose your own adventure" novel on screen. However, if I'm being honest, the story and characters are what draw me to video games in the first place; once those run their course, I quickly lose interest in repeat play-throughs, competition modes, and elusive trophies. (The Batman: Arkham series is sort of an exception to this...but that's because it's Batman.)

In other words, Jurassic Park: The Game has surprised me with its authenticity, tension, and depth, and I'm very interested to see how Chapter 2 will pick up on the cliffhanger ending of Chapter 1. The deserved Teen rating and single player restriction means it's not a game I can share with my kids yet (much to their disappointment), but once they're ready for the movie itself, they'll be ready for this.

And while I'm on the topic of downloadable games, here are the others we've collected. Prices are subject to change and not all are exclusive to the PSN.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

Today the first trailer for the new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie was released:



I sort of get all the fans' fear and loathing about this one. Michael Bay producing, Megan Fox as April, Shredder has been whitewashed, etc. The current Nickelodeon cartoon is a lot of fun (my six-year-old and I have followed it faithfully) and it's a little odd that its live-action counterpart is not really its counterpart -- i.e., they look nothing alike. True, the movies never have been faithful to any of the animated series, but at least they were to each other; even the 2007 CGI movie was intended as a loose installment in that series (the fourth). This, however, is the only TMNT film not connected to the others, causing worry (fueled by early comments from Michael Bay about aliens and stuff) that it will try to be too different.

At the same time, I don't get all the fuss. Every film in that series was tonally different than the others, and if you ask me, a reboot can't do any worse. It may even do better. Remember Vanilla Ice? Super Shredder? Time travel? Leonardo trains in Central America in the same film in which ancient Aztec warriors try to take over New York...and there's absolutely zero connection? And that's just the movies. My point is, the Turtles have seen a lot of incarnations, from comic to cartoon to toy to video game to film, and all of them have been just a little bit stupid nuts...because this is the Ninja Turtles we're talking about! I loved all that cheesy, crazy, not-to-be-taken-too-seriously stuff as a kid, and my own kid does now. (A recent episode involved a mutation between a cat and...ice cream. Michelangelo could both pet and lick it. Seriously.) So when we finally see this new movie -- as we inevitably will -- will I be worried about how it validates my childhood, or my son's?

Yes, I hope that "Eric Sachs" -- this movie's Oroku Saki/Shredder -- is some sort of red herring. Yes, I wish they had gone with a tall Splinter a la the current cartoon (instead, he's played by Danny Woodburn). Yes, I wish April was more interesting. But these are all details, and when it comes to a Turtles movie, the biggest thing that matters is the Turtles themselves. Unlike most reactions I've seen, I actually like the CGI redesign. A human-sized turtle really should be big and bulky, because...shells! I enjoyed the lean, more "teenaged" look in the animated film, but I'm intrigued by these grittier designs, and I expect the action will be a lot of fun.

And Michelangelo's gag at the end? You can't tell me you didn't laugh at that!